I have modo that I now use for this machine. "I do not need to participate!" There is so many things I see now that do not need participation....the latest upgrade (phone, computer), the latest movies, the news cycles. Even the changes in the catholic church....i do not need to participate and choose something different. Old books are lately my favorite especially all the old Saints in the catholic church.
I started drawing lines and setting rules when I started nuking my social media accounts. Frankly, I never liked using them, but I could see that the algorithms were deliberately amplifying and rewarding anger, ennui, and "engagement". And besides, Facebook in particular was doing everything possible to hide things like family news or updates from old friends (even hiding direct messages from them and labeling it junk), so the whole "keeping in touch" notion was made moot.
Unfortunately I cannot completely rid myself of the "smart" phone. I wanted tickets to go see a musical - the ticket office no longer issues paper tickets due to fraud and scalpers, so a smartphone is the only way I can actually go. I run a business, but my bank will not let me access my accounts without my using that thing to prove I am myself. And so on.
Regarding "touching grass" - I do a lot of photography. Love your wood thrush photo. They're really shy in my area, so tough to spot, but they have such a haunting call during nesting season. I finally only got good shots of them this year, after several years of trying.
Thank you for referencing Kingsworth's interview on Unherd. As Americans who hold to the intrinsic value of our Constitution, we have taken a decidedly different path in the way we view ourselves as citizens and our necessary response to our Government as versus that of Europe and the World at large.
To the conversation at large, I strongly believe in critical thinking and proper dialogue as the only means of holding society together.
And I have bought many of your books. Surprisingly my husband has read several and greatly enjoyed them, and he does not like to read religious books even though he knows he should, especially during lent, so this is high praise. They are short and packed with meaning.
The biggest tonic to excess online life: Get outdoors (and make sure your kids do too). Yes, that can be hard to do up north in the winter, and hard down here in Florida at high summer. Do it anyway. Just dress properly for the cold, hydrate in high heat etc.
"On the Reading of Old Books" is a great essay, and it applies to old films, too -- a connection you have clearly made and taken to heart.
I share your attitude about the news, too, although I'm afraid I mostly honor it in the breach. (Here follows the inevitable ironic observation that we're talking about all this on Substack.)
chipper? And soulless? You have my attention. And give a couple good examples of the movies from the early 30's. And also - first do no medicine is a good way now
Oh, so many good ones. I like the Philo Vance detective movies, "Canary Murder," "Kennel Murder," "Benson Murder Case." Particularly mature and thoughtful, "Midnight" shows members of a community as they wait for a woman to be executed at midnight. "The Pointing Finger," "The Death Kiss," "The Hole in the Wall," "The Ninth Guest." "The Sin of Nina Moran" does some surprising things, for its era, with time shifts and mixing of memories. "Devil and the Deep" is psychologically profound. "The Blue Angel" is too true to human character, and too heartbreaking. I seem to be all about dramas today, but there are great comedies, fascinating musical numbers, the early Westerns, and more. "Bottoms Up" is very funny, and the Marx Brothers movies are superb, of course.
About 17 or so years ago, I met you at an Antiochian woman’s retreat in Northern California…at the outdoor Coffee machine…
Just you and me when everyone else scurried off to the next meeting…
I couldn’t face another crowd without getting away and fortifying myself with more coffee…(I hadn’t been diagnosed with autism yet)
You were calm and that helped me.
We never know what will be healing to another person.
I’m 77 and my ability to read vanished. Pain keeps me isolated but I get to my Parish in Loveland CO sometimes.
I thank God for LIVE Orthodox internet broadcasts and Zoom. Without this, I don’t see or talk to anyone.
People shouldn’t tell you to have or not have a vaccine or any medical care. It’s not their business. (Comments on how you could dress better! Lose weight, cut your hair… all of it!)
I don't get the flu shot but I can't imagine getting into an argument over it, especially online . . . All of this is great advice and mostly how I try to do as well. FB can draw me in sometimes if I'm feeling lazy or otherwise unmotivated (chronic pain can do that to me, too), but I work at keeping it for family and friends and getting news from sources that I trust (friends who post articles from reputable sources, not just anything that pops up). I kinda have to stay up on the news because my wonderful husband will keep me up on it if I don't, and then I don't have anything to contribute to the conversation. :) But I never use my phone except as what a phone used to be and to take photos, and I'm so happy with that. If I'm going to be online I've got to get on the laptop, which is less convenient, so I'm not tempted to scroll all day or pay attention to notifications. Thanks for posting this, as it reminds me that there are others who are not tied to technology as well! (P.S. You won't remember this, but I've always remembered meeting you at Bryan College many years ago [I was a faculty member, since retired] and appreciating your wisdom both in chapel and in a small group over lunch.)
Thank you, Frederica, for putting this all into words. I’ve been thinking lately that what I consume, fills me up, and when what I consume is not created to bring me closer to Christ - well then that leaves so much less room inside of me to Christ to fit in there. Sometimes he doesn’t even fit at all.
That is why I try to stay away from news or content antithetical to Christ…because with even just a small amount of exposure, I can feel my connection to God feeling frayed. And who wants that?? It really does make praying harder - I don’t have as much energy for it when any of my energy has been spent toiling over the latest worldly catastrophes and fearful messages.
Maybe some of us are more sensitive to this than others, but I have gone back and forth many times until settling on this conclusion, which always turns out the same.
Yes, me too. I think when I was starting out as a writer, 35 yrs ago, I was much more casual about things, and I can remember watching MTV way back when! But there came a time that when I moved into a hotel room I didn't want to turn on the TV. Gradually my sense of Jesus' presence kept getting stronger, and then I didn't want anything to meddle with that! Yet if someone had told me I should be sensitive to that, I should be preserving stillness, I dont think I could have understood them, back then. It sure is wonderful now, having this kind of prayer connection with him, and he is so real and so constant. I wish everybody would have this.
"You might even ask someone on a date. If it works out, have babies." I almost choked when I read that :) That's very good advice!
I have a desire to avoid endless discussions on Facebook, I try not to always have the last word, but too often my tendency to argue gets the better of me. But I don't feel comfortable with it.
Unfortunately, for various reasons, I have to have a Facebook account. My wife deleted hers, and I'm a little envious of her!
I am off of Facebook now, but perhaps this would help. If you know who the argumentative people are, you can Unfollow them and they will never know that you are no longer following them. People hesitate to unfriend a person so this is a good alternative.
We took your recommendation to listen to audiobooks on Librivox, so we installed their app on my wife's phone. On the app's home screen was a link to "Create your account," so we clicked it, and it asked for our credit card info, saying "Your account will not be charged."
Right after we entered the info, we got this message from our bank: "FreeMSG-First National Bank 1-833-735-1892: Reply YES or NO if you used debit card ending 1172, FITIBLUR, $34.79. STOP to opt out." We replied "NO." Then we got another message from the bank saying our card has been blocked.
A few hours later, we received a call from the bank saying that FITIBLUR had put the charge thru a second time, after the first one was stopped, and we explained that we did not authorize either charge. Then we had to call customer service to request a new debit card.
This whole affair has caused us big headache. I hope you'll update this post to tell people not to install Librivox's smartphone app!
What a disaster! I'm so sorry you had to deal with this. I've never had any request for card info on Librivox. I tried it again after reading this, and downloaded "The Black Arrow" without any such meddling. I *think* Librivox is still safe to use. I wonder if you inadvertently installed a copycat app?
It's the free version of Librivox with ads. Several of them say "Create your account" in large print, and only in small print does it say the name of another app it wants you to buy. The full version of Librivox ($3.99) has no ads.
Huh. I signed up so long ago that I haven't encountered that. Gosh, I'm so sorry this happened! I just got off the phone with Mastercard and they had to cancel my card due to fraud. It's a bad scene out there.
Same here: we had to cancel my wife's debit card and are waiting for a new one. Thankfully, my debit card has a different number, so it still works for our joint checking account.
Yes, yes! We moved to Johnson City seven years ago, when my husband (an Orthodox pastor) retired. Our son, Fr Stephen Mathewes, is pastor of the Orthodox church in Bluff City. We LOVE it here! And everyone is so kind and friendly. It's a whole different world from Baltimore, that's for sure.
If you see a Scott's Strawberry stand around town in the spring, that's my family. Also highly recommend going over to the market in Unicoi for ice cream.
You're in a beautiful area as I found this spring when I briefly visited.
I'm going up to Baltimore next weekend for my former church's annual Bull & Oyster Roast fund raiser-- something I will always go back for. I'm glad I don;t live there any more, for a number of reasons, but I don't regret the years I did.
lol, the song went, I fought the law, thats what came to mind when I saw your title.....agree with you completely about the natural world of Gods creation!
I have modo that I now use for this machine. "I do not need to participate!" There is so many things I see now that do not need participation....the latest upgrade (phone, computer), the latest movies, the news cycles. Even the changes in the catholic church....i do not need to participate and choose something different. Old books are lately my favorite especially all the old Saints in the catholic church.
I started drawing lines and setting rules when I started nuking my social media accounts. Frankly, I never liked using them, but I could see that the algorithms were deliberately amplifying and rewarding anger, ennui, and "engagement". And besides, Facebook in particular was doing everything possible to hide things like family news or updates from old friends (even hiding direct messages from them and labeling it junk), so the whole "keeping in touch" notion was made moot.
Unfortunately I cannot completely rid myself of the "smart" phone. I wanted tickets to go see a musical - the ticket office no longer issues paper tickets due to fraud and scalpers, so a smartphone is the only way I can actually go. I run a business, but my bank will not let me access my accounts without my using that thing to prove I am myself. And so on.
Regarding "touching grass" - I do a lot of photography. Love your wood thrush photo. They're really shy in my area, so tough to spot, but they have such a haunting call during nesting season. I finally only got good shots of them this year, after several years of trying.
You just need to be on hand when they step out of the shower :-)
your humor (hugs)
Vaccines are very much at heart of this. We don't all get a shot. Paul Kingsnorth on vaccines: https://youtu.be/N_uAwsVn10Y?si=RL--im8A8JThDW6j
I am so out of it. Thanks for cluing me in.
Reflecting that it's the paradox of trying to withdraw from the news and the online conversations--you can blithely make big mistakes.
Thanks for the article! It can be good to be out of it!
Thank you for referencing Kingsworth's interview on Unherd. As Americans who hold to the intrinsic value of our Constitution, we have taken a decidedly different path in the way we view ourselves as citizens and our necessary response to our Government as versus that of Europe and the World at large.
To the conversation at large, I strongly believe in critical thinking and proper dialogue as the only means of holding society together.
Lovely and timely advice.
And I have bought many of your books. Surprisingly my husband has read several and greatly enjoyed them, and he does not like to read religious books even though he knows he should, especially during lent, so this is high praise. They are short and packed with meaning.
Thank you for your work.
Well on a good note: I got my flu shot Wednesday too! Costco had them and no time like the present…
You have some excellent ideas for at least reducing screen time and what we take in.
The horrors of this week has me rethinking this. I read too much, and didn’t pray nearly enough. Thank you for your timely reminder.
The biggest tonic to excess online life: Get outdoors (and make sure your kids do too). Yes, that can be hard to do up north in the winter, and hard down here in Florida at high summer. Do it anyway. Just dress properly for the cold, hydrate in high heat etc.
Much appreciation for this thoughtful piece.
"On the Reading of Old Books" is a great essay, and it applies to old films, too -- a connection you have clearly made and taken to heart.
I share your attitude about the news, too, although I'm afraid I mostly honor it in the breach. (Here follows the inevitable ironic observation that we're talking about all this on Substack.)
chipper? And soulless? You have my attention. And give a couple good examples of the movies from the early 30's. And also - first do no medicine is a good way now
Oh, so many good ones. I like the Philo Vance detective movies, "Canary Murder," "Kennel Murder," "Benson Murder Case." Particularly mature and thoughtful, "Midnight" shows members of a community as they wait for a woman to be executed at midnight. "The Pointing Finger," "The Death Kiss," "The Hole in the Wall," "The Ninth Guest." "The Sin of Nina Moran" does some surprising things, for its era, with time shifts and mixing of memories. "Devil and the Deep" is psychologically profound. "The Blue Angel" is too true to human character, and too heartbreaking. I seem to be all about dramas today, but there are great comedies, fascinating musical numbers, the early Westerns, and more. "Bottoms Up" is very funny, and the Marx Brothers movies are superb, of course.
About 17 or so years ago, I met you at an Antiochian woman’s retreat in Northern California…at the outdoor Coffee machine…
Just you and me when everyone else scurried off to the next meeting…
I couldn’t face another crowd without getting away and fortifying myself with more coffee…(I hadn’t been diagnosed with autism yet)
You were calm and that helped me.
We never know what will be healing to another person.
I’m 77 and my ability to read vanished. Pain keeps me isolated but I get to my Parish in Loveland CO sometimes.
I thank God for LIVE Orthodox internet broadcasts and Zoom. Without this, I don’t see or talk to anyone.
People shouldn’t tell you to have or not have a vaccine or any medical care. It’s not their business. (Comments on how you could dress better! Lose weight, cut your hair… all of it!)
Anyway… thank you my ADHD thanks you too!
I'm so glad we had that encounter, and that it was somehow useful to you. It is true suffering. A diagnosis helps, doesn't it!
And there you are in Loveland, like my old friends Dn Mark and Sh Ina O'Dell. Do you attend St. Spyridon?
I don't get the flu shot but I can't imagine getting into an argument over it, especially online . . . All of this is great advice and mostly how I try to do as well. FB can draw me in sometimes if I'm feeling lazy or otherwise unmotivated (chronic pain can do that to me, too), but I work at keeping it for family and friends and getting news from sources that I trust (friends who post articles from reputable sources, not just anything that pops up). I kinda have to stay up on the news because my wonderful husband will keep me up on it if I don't, and then I don't have anything to contribute to the conversation. :) But I never use my phone except as what a phone used to be and to take photos, and I'm so happy with that. If I'm going to be online I've got to get on the laptop, which is less convenient, so I'm not tempted to scroll all day or pay attention to notifications. Thanks for posting this, as it reminds me that there are others who are not tied to technology as well! (P.S. You won't remember this, but I've always remembered meeting you at Bryan College many years ago [I was a faculty member, since retired] and appreciating your wisdom both in chapel and in a small group over lunch.)
Thank you, Frederica, for putting this all into words. I’ve been thinking lately that what I consume, fills me up, and when what I consume is not created to bring me closer to Christ - well then that leaves so much less room inside of me to Christ to fit in there. Sometimes he doesn’t even fit at all.
That is why I try to stay away from news or content antithetical to Christ…because with even just a small amount of exposure, I can feel my connection to God feeling frayed. And who wants that?? It really does make praying harder - I don’t have as much energy for it when any of my energy has been spent toiling over the latest worldly catastrophes and fearful messages.
Maybe some of us are more sensitive to this than others, but I have gone back and forth many times until settling on this conclusion, which always turns out the same.
Yes, me too. I think when I was starting out as a writer, 35 yrs ago, I was much more casual about things, and I can remember watching MTV way back when! But there came a time that when I moved into a hotel room I didn't want to turn on the TV. Gradually my sense of Jesus' presence kept getting stronger, and then I didn't want anything to meddle with that! Yet if someone had told me I should be sensitive to that, I should be preserving stillness, I dont think I could have understood them, back then. It sure is wonderful now, having this kind of prayer connection with him, and he is so real and so constant. I wish everybody would have this.
"You might even ask someone on a date. If it works out, have babies." I almost choked when I read that :) That's very good advice!
I have a desire to avoid endless discussions on Facebook, I try not to always have the last word, but too often my tendency to argue gets the better of me. But I don't feel comfortable with it.
Unfortunately, for various reasons, I have to have a Facebook account. My wife deleted hers, and I'm a little envious of her!
I am off of Facebook now, but perhaps this would help. If you know who the argumentative people are, you can Unfollow them and they will never know that you are no longer following them. People hesitate to unfriend a person so this is a good alternative.
Hi Frederica,
We took your recommendation to listen to audiobooks on Librivox, so we installed their app on my wife's phone. On the app's home screen was a link to "Create your account," so we clicked it, and it asked for our credit card info, saying "Your account will not be charged."
Right after we entered the info, we got this message from our bank: "FreeMSG-First National Bank 1-833-735-1892: Reply YES or NO if you used debit card ending 1172, FITIBLUR, $34.79. STOP to opt out." We replied "NO." Then we got another message from the bank saying our card has been blocked.
A few hours later, we received a call from the bank saying that FITIBLUR had put the charge thru a second time, after the first one was stopped, and we explained that we did not authorize either charge. Then we had to call customer service to request a new debit card.
This whole affair has caused us big headache. I hope you'll update this post to tell people not to install Librivox's smartphone app!
What a disaster! I'm so sorry you had to deal with this. I've never had any request for card info on Librivox. I tried it again after reading this, and downloaded "The Black Arrow" without any such meddling. I *think* Librivox is still safe to use. I wonder if you inadvertently installed a copycat app?
It's the free version of Librivox with ads. Several of them say "Create your account" in large print, and only in small print does it say the name of another app it wants you to buy. The full version of Librivox ($3.99) has no ads.
Huh. I signed up so long ago that I haven't encountered that. Gosh, I'm so sorry this happened! I just got off the phone with Mastercard and they had to cancel my card due to fraud. It's a bad scene out there.
Same here: we had to cancel my wife's debit card and are waiting for a new one. Thankfully, my debit card has a different number, so it still works for our joint checking account.
Paul Kingsnorth shared this but then I read Buffalo Mountain. That's Johnson City! My hometown! (Well technically Unicoi but you get it). Great read!
Yes, yes! We moved to Johnson City seven years ago, when my husband (an Orthodox pastor) retired. Our son, Fr Stephen Mathewes, is pastor of the Orthodox church in Bluff City. We LOVE it here! And everyone is so kind and friendly. It's a whole different world from Baltimore, that's for sure.
If you see a Scott's Strawberry stand around town in the spring, that's my family. Also highly recommend going over to the market in Unicoi for ice cream.
You're in a beautiful area as I found this spring when I briefly visited.
I'm going up to Baltimore next weekend for my former church's annual Bull & Oyster Roast fund raiser-- something I will always go back for. I'm glad I don;t live there any more, for a number of reasons, but I don't regret the years I did.
Thank you
lol, the song went, I fought the law, thats what came to mind when I saw your title.....agree with you completely about the natural world of Gods creation!